Life after college can be a haze. Sometimes it feels like you are just waking up, doing a bunch of “stuff”, and going back to sleep. Whether your life after college has been as steady as a rock or as uncertain as the weather in Chicago (which has been really nice lately), the feeling of existing but not of living can take over.

Since my Life Emergency, to say my life has been as uncertain as the Chicago weather usually is would be an understatement. I will be revealing all in the upcoming because if I had to tell all, it would be a short novel. Today, however, I want to talk about reflecting.

Do you take time once a day, a week, a month to reflect on who you are and who you want to be?

I did a couple of days ago and I realized one of the reasons I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off, both literally and metaphorically, is taking time to reflect had been put on the back burner in my life.  Reflecting allows me to see things for what they are; it allows me to remember my values and the type of person I want to become.

The truth is I have always had a strong sense of self – I know that I am competitive and commanding; a good talker and seldom afraid of confrontation. I know that I want to do something good and great and really make a difference. I know that I want to always be surrounded by people who are inspiring and make me feel like I can do anything. I also know that I can be terribly impatient, a poor listener and not always willing to let things slide (which sometimes is best). In my work and play, I want to make a difference to someone’s life. The best compliment I will ever receive is that somehow I changed someone’s life for the better.  For me the ideal is to be honest, classy and unforgettable.

WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE?

I think making a decision to be the kind of person you want to be is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. I also think few of us actually take the time to do this.  We allow the past or the community of life’s circumstances to dictate who we are, and although those things make their contribution, you and I have a choice to be who we want to be. Let me make this clear: You may have had little or no choice regarding your upbringing, the surplus or lack of finances your family had, the school you went to, etc. but you do have a choice about your character and how  you treat others.

And when you’ve made that choice, you have to act. You have to make a concerted effort to not let the “stuff” of life preventing you from being that person. I let my worry over uncertainty in my work life, my worry of money, of my visa sponsorship and indeed even my nostalgia for college, get in my head and stay there. And as I worried, every little problem because grandiose. I forgot to remember the most important thing – who I am and who I want to be.

My life after college has indeed been a roller coaster but I don’t think I’m the first one to experience this and I certainly don’t think I’m going to be the last. And it’s high time I start enjoying the ride because as terrifying as roller coasters can be, they are also exciting.  In fact, they’re so exciting that when we’re done with one, we usually we want to do it all over again or try a new one. Maybe your 20s are just one roller coaster after another and if you don’t endure how frightening the ride can be, you won’t enjoy the thrill of the ride either.

This is why I love reflecting. It gives perspective; it allows you to stop, and think just soak up life. So, I say: know thyself, know thy principles and enjoy the roller-coaster ride that is your 20s.

WHAT DO YOU SAY?